December One: “Blue Christmas”

Today I found myself staring in utter disbelief at the calender. I couldn't believe it was already December. What sick joke is this? Where did my year go?? What was my New Year's Resolution again?

I've been a little blue this holiday season. Bored. And Uninspired. I know in my heart that only I can make me un-bored or un-uninspired (mouthful!), but I just seem to do the same things over and over again anyways.

No thanks, Hot Lips. I got this.

Today I have decided to take my 30 seconds

to Commit myself to becoming an inspired person.

I will be a person who Does What makes her

Come alive

inside

I am Awake. I am Alive. I am Inspired, dang it!

I have gotten a bit lazy with the things that really matter in my life and let myself get bored. I sit down to write and then, magically, three episodes of Fringe later, it's time for bed. Then, I complain about not having time to do things that make me happy (though, admittedly that is a good show...). How does that math add up? I have been doing things that have been lulling myself into the doldrums. Well, no more, missy.

No need to wait for a magic kiss, I am snapping out of this waking slummer on my own, I do declare!

Stay tuned! Another post to come Dec 1st!!

Hello my lovely followers!!

Thank you for all your love and support! I am changing the posting schedule to once a month now, on the first of every month. Expect an exciting 30 second insight on the first of December! Love you all and thanks so much for reading!

Just hanging out with the minion pumpkin :) Hope your Halloween was a fun one!

Week Five: “Where Art Thou?”

It’s much like a magic trick, how quickly I can make money disappear. It’s impressive, really, and would be more so, if anyone could ever find a use for the skill. Ha. One might say I have a super power that no one wants.

This week, I took a closer look at what was slowing me down financially. I had recently paid off some debt (yay!!!), lowering my monthly expenses, but I still seemed to have just as little money at the end of the day. It was disconcerting to simple not know where my money was going.

Working over forty hours a week

Having little debt

And no money???

This was not a fun riddle for me!! What the heck? Playing Where’s Waldo with the green things that run so much of my life was quite an eye opener. I need change! (no pun intended) ;) Before I panicked, I took my 30 seconds to see what was the problem. Obviously, it was a compilation of seemingly [small] expenditures that were mobilizing to overthrow me. 

By disrespecting the small change in my pocket, I had inadvertently given over the power of my entire financial well being to these various mini-pleasures. What has Starbucks prevented me from doing year? Going on a trip?

Oh that's were I put it.

What was it that my dad always said?

Oh yeah.

Budget. (egh.)

Getting over my initial reaction to this uninspiring and tedious word, I start to look at it in a different light. A budget will

give the power Back to me.

It helps me to move from financial Reaction to financial Choice. This next year may still have just as many visits to the Cafes as the last, but taking ownership of my spending choices ahead of time makes all the difference.

Week Four: "Friend or Foe?"

Last weekend, I found myself speeding to work, trying to stuff my face with a last-minute meal. The broccoli, over-steamed, was stone cold, as were the carrots. Sitting conspicuously next to the veggies, was a formidable, previously frozen, cheesy, bacon sprinkled, chicken-like substance, waiting to be consumed. I shudder now, thinking about the meal, and even more, thinking about how I had felt halfway through my shift.

I teeter between viewing food as a reward system: I was good and worked out, so I can have some ice cream vs. viewing food as an enemy needing to be conquered as in "Damn, I ate some ice cream, now I need to work out." Now, I am beginning to wonder if my entire view on food is a bit corrupt…

Today’s 30 Seconds is used to take a closer look at the chemical compounds I call food…

This is not the first time that I have sought enlightenment on the subject. I have had many conversations with friends about it. The theme changes slightly from time to time, but it always comes down to this:

Is my food friend or FOE?

Bringing an emotional element into meal preparation is easy. A friend once recommended looking at food purely as a source of fuel. Many athletes view it the same way. They push aside worries of calories, carbs and gluclose, and focus on what will help perform optimally. If I constantly eat something that slows my system down, I am only working against myself. I am adding a stress to my body that it just doesn’t need. If I want my body to last, I will take time to look at how I am treating it.

This week: I will look at food with fresh eyes. I will give my body the energy it needs to perform its best for the day and help my body stay as young as it possibly can, for as long as it possibly can.

Another to come next Monday!

Week Three: “Hear me roar!”

(borrowed from Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/pin/554787247817947974 )

This week was a long continuous struggle with writing. It is an absolute paradox to me that something that is so invigorating and rewarding to me, also can be such a pain in my butt. Instead of a smooth working relationship, my writing and I occasionally become locked a viscous wrestling match.

This week was one of those times.

Simple emails, this blog, and especially my novel were almost nonentities these past few days. Words were a twisted jumbled mess in my brain and came out even uglier. Things that normally took a few minutes to jot down, took closer to an hour. Resisting the urge to throw my coffee and the nearest human being, I took the time to ask why? This week’s 30 seconds was used to look at my blocks in life.

Tucked away neatly behind my blocks to writing, is fear.

Fear is my driving force behind resistance.

Fear of failure.

Fear of imperfection.

Fear of vulner-

abil

ity.

It takes a lot of courage to let it go. It takes a tremendous amount of bravery to put it all out there. The blank all-knowing, all-showing page of paper can be my sword, if I let it. It is a fact I often forget. Weeks like this, give me the imagery of a lion looking in the mirror and seeing a mouse, instead of the strong, fierce being it is. It is not the writing I am struggling with; it is myself.  When I am feeling small I will set my pen down and tell that mirror it is wrong!

I am strong.

I am brave!

I can do it!

Next week: When I run into a block I will take my 30 seconds to roar like the lion I am and remember that I am capable of anything!

Stay tuned! More to come next Monday!

Week Two: “To Run, or Not To Run: That is the Question.”

This week I have heard a series of strange creaking, cracking noises coming from various parts of my body. Apparently, it has decided to become its own orchestra of pain instead of the cool, running machine I want it to be. 

My entire childhood I thought adults were lying to me, or at the very least exaggerating, when they moaned about this ailment or the next, warning, that it would someday happen to me. Kids! Be warned! It is not a lie! Father time is here to kick ass.

Seriously body, I am not an eighty-year-old woman, no matter what you are trying to say. As I am racked, left and right, with shin splints, knee pain, foot pain, hell, even elbow pain (I still can’t figure out why…) it is then, that I am left with the dilemma: to run or not to run….

This is where I meet an old nemesis: doubt. Am I being a baby, or do I risk worse injury by running?

I finally splurged and got a running coach. It turns out that I am not alone. I am not the only runner that ended up hobbling home sooner than anticipated, feeling like they were just hit by a rather large bus. I am not the only one to start to lose heart. With a smile, my coach asked me not to give up hope. The secret to finding my Zen in working out: listen to my body (even if we happen to be fighting at the moment). It knows when it needs to rest and when it needs a run.

When the pain hits I take a deep breath and a quick 30 seconds

       to tune into my body.  

I remind myself it is only temporary

REST is AN important part of running

It is ok

I’m ok

Come on, stop lying to me Dad.

Run or Walk, Jog or Sleep, It is all a part of improving my body. I get so caught up in the goal or the stats of running: I ran 1 mile today, I ran 4 miles the next, that I forget that the reason I started running in the first place was to feel healthy. How can that happen if I run my body into the ground?

Week two: I take the scheduled breaks my running coach gave me and a little more if needed. :)

Week One: “No more monkeys jumping on the brain!”

This last week I took on a mantra of Rampage = bad.

At times my life seems to be out of my control, but how could that be possible when it is so hopelessly mundane. – Or so it seems, at least when compared to my childhood dreams and goals. We all did it: we gave ourselves dramatic goals that we were supposed to have already accomplished two or three years ago. But no one ever told us what to do when it came time to “pay the piper” and we were still paying student loans…

I was supposed to be traveling the world or at least saving it by now. How have I not discovered the cure for cancer? Or been scuba diving? Life is flying me by and I keep missing the flight!

I beat myself up and wonder what have I had been doing this whole time, but I am only 27. I am not due for a mid-life crisis for another 15 years!

It is times like these that I have to remember to breathe. It is so easy to get caught in my brain and beat to the point of hysterics by expectations.

I take my 30 seconds and remember that I am perfect.

I am exactly were I need to be.

There is nothing that I need to have done. No where I need to be.

I am Perfect.

I am

I am

Just who I need to be.

San Tan Valley, Arizona 2012 Shot by Angelina Spence

There is beauty everywhere, even in dusty San Tan Valley, Arizona. I don’t need to be scaling mountains in Europe to see wonder. It can be found right here in my back yard.

Life is not over. True, I cannot go back and relive the past ten years, but I can choose what I do for the next ten. Today, may not be the day that I go scuba diving in the Coral Reefs in Australia, but it can be the day that I sign up for scuba lessons.

Week one: I quiet my brain and take one tiny step towards my dream.

Mesa, Arizona 2012  Shot by Angelina Spence

Monday September 30th

Stay tuned folks! The first post to come on Monday!